Just one of those days.

If you're an old fogey like me, you will clearly remember Monica's hit "Just One of Those Days". Well, that is certainly the case for me today. It's hard to pinpoint what exactly sent me over the edge this morning, but since I'm a big emotional basket case during the wonderful months known to me as "Tax Season Hell" I can guarantee that it was probably something as minute as the holes in my friggin socks again. The plain truth of the matter is, I miss my pain in the arse husband and can't imagine how in the hell single mothers do it. (for those that don't know, Ben is an accountant and has been working from 7am-11pm six nights a week) It's so hard to balance taking care of my kids (aka making sure they make it thru the day in once piece), cleaning the house, doing all the required mundane things it takes to run a household, and working at night. Just when I think I have it under control, things seem to fall apart again. This is huge for me, being that I am so type A that everything needs to be in control and somewhat organized or else I fall off the deep end. Hell, it's even big for me to admit that I need help because I'm the type of person that never used to ask for it. It usually doesn't take me long to regain my composure, but when I am feeling down, I am doooooown. Like, I want to go sit in a dressing room, try on clothes, and eat a gallon of ice cream while someone plays the violin. Maybe I should take up knitting and knit myself some new socks. Even the Pilate's' instructor this morning had to force my shoulders to relax and told me I was "a little ball of stress". Of course, this caused the waterworks to flow right then and there, which was almost as embarrassing as the woman next to me who kept letting out farts.

Yes, today is just one of those days... thankfully I have my little man Nathan who told me he wants to "give me a hug and make me happy". And here I thought I was the one who was supposed to make the boo-boos feel better. My boys have a way of making me see the light at the end of the tunnel. My non-stop, non-snuggly Ollie even allowed me to rock him to sleep in my arms, something he hasn't done since he was an infant, which gave me some time to reflect. I am discovering each day that I am learning more and more from my children... I think the lesson of the day today is that I need a "time out"... hmm, maybe I can sneak a hot shower in while Ollie naps. Fingers crossed!!

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Then I went to the mall.

Hopefully you all weren't too worried that I didn't post yesterday. I know someone had to think the kids had me tied up and locked in a dark room, anything to keep me off "Mommy's puter" as Nathan calls it. I didn't get a chance to write because I was too busy enjoying a perfectly relaxing and uneventful day completed by a nice dinner waiting for me and a glass of wine by the fireplace. Wait a minute, I must still be in my dreams... I keep doing that! Nah, yesterday I was just caught up in the hustle and bustle of any given day, except that it actually was rather uneventful and I even got to sneak in a child-free one hour trip to the mall thanks to a surprise visit from Santa... I mean, my brother-in-law, Adam. Not that the trip boosted my morale at all since it involved trying on clothes for a bachelorette party I have next weekend. If I could get that hour back, I probably would have gone for a pedicure or tortured myself with a second hour at the gym. I hate trying on clothes, especially in the dead of winter and after picking up yet another obsession, Stella Artois. That beer has become a staple in our house and thanks to the nifty Stella beer glasses courtesy of Carrabbas, I can now enjoy 1, OK 3, nightly in what appears to be a wine glass. Hello, empty calories. Yes, nothing screams fun like trying on 25 dresses in the attempt to look somewhat cute compared to the 14 other young and (child-less) girls I'll be partying with. The party is for my BFF, Jenn's little sister, I'm just tagging along to chaperone and drive them all around in my mommy van so we look extra hip. Adding to my disdain for trying on clothes is the fact that I now have to make sure everything matches my brand new tattoo. That was one thing (oops) I didn't think of when getting it on my front shoulder. Now I can't wear lime green since it doesn't match it... damn.

While on a moms night out the other night, at Triumph Brewery in Philly, we talked about women and their insecurities about their bodies. I swear, whoever invented the review feature on a digital camera needs a good spanking. I don't know anyone that screams, "OMG! I just LOVE that picture of me!!" unless they're a couple (a few) drinks in and have their beer goggles on. No, instead it's usually "I look fat!" "My face looks fat!" "That's my bad angle! (that's my personal excuse) or "Delete it, delete it!!" In a twisted way, it's nice to know I am not the only mom that feels like pictures of herself are the new Chinese water torture. I know, I know, 'I'm a mom, I nurtured two children, I love my body,' blah blah blah, whatever that Facebook chain mail post said a few days ago. In reality, yes, I am a mother of two, in the past 4 years I have collectedly gained and lost a total of 75 pounds on a frame comparable to a gymnast or a freakin horse jockey. I have stretch marks and stretched skin and no one tells you the wonderful after effects of breastfeeding 2 kids... yeaaaa, let's just say I now have to set up a new savings fund, specifically for Victoria's Secret super whammo bammo push-up bras. Yes, I do love my children obsessively and am proud that I carried them in my big ol belly, but what mom doesn't long for her pre-children body, before the saggy boobs and saggy everything else? I probably sound like a big wambulance right now, but wah, wah, wah.

On the flip side, I had a bag of chips for breakfast and didn't feel one bit guilty about it. At least I got some veggies in for the day already.

That's Odd.

Sweet dreams, baby boy

Yesterday my good friend and favorite bartender, Couzin Ed, asked me what the weirdest thing was that Nathan has ever done. I had to really think about it all day and night and this morning I figured out what the answer is. Drum roll please..........(insert drum noise) absolutely NOTHING. Yup, you read right. Kids have a way of distorting your view of what "normal" used to be. Ever since Nathan was potty trained about a month ago, he's taken a liking to running around the house sans pants or underwear, and while it may seem weird to an outsider (especially the Meter Man and Ben's grandparents) it is totally normal to me. One might think it strange that Oliver climbs on everything he gets his chubby little legs on, especially if you're trying to enjoy a meal at the table and he's dancing on top of it to the beat of your fork hitting the plate, but that's an every day occurrence for me.

I'm not sure if my own ocd like tendencies have rubbed off on my boys already, but Nathan does have some rather "odd" quirks. For instance, he:

• likes to wash his hands incessantly and doesn't like anything on them (paint, food, etc)
• will not touch any condiments (thatta boy) and only eats specific kinds of food (think chicken fingers as opposed to nuggets)
• will not go to bed without all 10 of his "friends" (stuffed animals) and 5 blankets
• needs these friends lined up in a particular order above his head and next to him
• can watch the same TV episode over and over, no matter how many times he has seen it
• likes to wear his PJ's in public
• drinks coffee (just little sips, people)
• likes to sleep in a tent, pictured above.

Hmm.. on second glance, all of these things are normal for pre-schoolers. (minus the coffee. I know, I'm a bad mommy!) Maybe I'm the weirdo for not having fun and doing things his way. Just think how much fun it would be to go to work in your pajamas, watch TV to your heart's content, and have a sleepover in a tent with 10 of your friends! My boy has discovered the key to happiness at the tender age of three. I just knew he was going to be doing BIG things.

Goooood Morning!

The strangest thing happened to me this morning. I literally HOPPED out of bed. OK, not literally, but you know what I mean. Holy crap, I slept like a log last night!! I vaguely remember that exercising made me sleep better at night, what a pleasant feeling to awake to. Even the boys dumping a whole can of Pringles on the floor before my very eyes didn't put a damper on my morning spirits. So... back to the gym I go with boys in tow... my body doesn't ache nearly as much as the first time I went back to the gym last summer, which leads me to believe that I'm not as 'unfit' as I thought I was. Woot woot!

On a side note, I am trying to find a sitter for tomorrow night, so I can go see my friend from work, Liat Arochas, play in Old City at Triumph Brewery. Any takers? Bueller??

Skincare

My friend Jaime told me I should blog about different products that I like, so here it goes.

I am obsessed with skincare, but most importantly, face skin care. The past few weeks I have been feeling stressed due to Ben's new work schedule and darn it, I am starting to break out. I also explained to my girlfriends that one of the kids must have thrown my favorite skincare item of the moment, The Neutragena Wave into the bath because it crapped out on me and I need to get a new one. They were all sold out of them at Target today, so I decided to go back to my old favorite blemish fighter, St. Ives Invigorating Apricot Scrub. I used it tonight in the shower and wow, what a difference even one use makes! And at $3.98 you can't beat it. My face felt tighter and smoother after just one use. I hardly ever switch face products and I can't remember why I ever stopped using this, but I am hooked on it once again. I should add that the exfoliating beads can be a little abrasive if you have extra sensitive skin, but they do offer a Gentle Apricot Scrub. If you want the professional reasons why you should exfoliate your skin, you can read about it HERE. St. Ives is perfect for washing away the mommy blues to reveal softer, brighter skin. This particular face wash has even won numerous awards, such as The Best Face Scrub in Glamour Magazine. (as if you read anything but Parents magazine!)

I need to post a picture of how much I am glowing right now! And, NO... I am not pregnant!

Gym, take 2.

Heeeeelllooo guns of steel

A few days ago I wrote about my love affair with soup. The title really should have read "My Love Affair with Pizza." I know it sounds silly, but hips don't lie, people. It doesn't help that my diet consists of mac and cheese (only the spiral kind, please) chicken fingers, Cheerios, peanut butter and fluff, Dunkin Donuts lattes, and yes... pizza. I mean, my last blog was about a pizzeria for Pete's sake. The inevitable has happened... it's almost March which means Spring is right around the corner, and thanks to the bathing suit display that welcomed me at my weekly trip to Target, I find myself feeling a wee bit anxious. I just barely took down my Christmas decorations a couple weeks ago, and they're already pushing BBQ equipment and sand buckets down our throats.

Anyway, after my Target binge, I took the boys to the beloved gym. I have been using all kinds of reasons why I stopped going a few months back, but in all honestly, maaaaan, I am just so damn tired! My days go like this:

• Roll (literally) out of bed.
• Stumble towards my trusty Keurig.
• Cook, clean, do laundry, pay bills, food shop, run errands, entertain children, prevent said children from falling off furniture, watch 345 episodes of Max and Ruby, clean up numerous forms of bodily and non-bodily fluids, read for 20 minutes a day just like Nick Jr. tells me, make sure all animals are cared for... (that's just the first half of the day before Ollie's nap time)
• Re-visit trusty Keurig.
• And finally... go to my other job, which requires a perky personality and 6 to 7 hours of standing on my feet.

I am not complaining by any means, I knew raising two kids was not going to be a cakewalk, but the time has come (yet again) for me to do a lil somethin somethin for myself. So, I went to the gym to sweat it out and I feel great! It gave me energy to get through the usually hectic dinner, baths, and night time routine. I remember when I was going regularly last summer, it felt so good to be doing something for myself... just one hour a day of not having to be Super-Mommy. My clothes fit better, I had more energy, and felt more confidant than ever. I long to feel that way again. I know I am not fat by any means, but I'm sure all mothers can relate when I say it's an internal desire to feel better about yourself, as well as the obvious benefits of looking better.

Pics to come as soon as I get the nerve to show the Before photo. :)

Cooking every night is for the birds.

Yesterday I went out to eat twice. Yes, I know, I'm a foodie. Either that or someone (ahem) needs to go food shopping. When I got home from brunch with my girlfriends it had actually been about 3 hours since I had eaten, so I asked Nathan what he wanted for dinner and he happily replied, "Pizza." Ben looked a little frazzled from an afternoon inside the house with the boys, so I suggested we get some wine to replace the bottle I had brought to the BYOB earlier. After hitting the liquor store and finagling the cashier to give me the online sale price for my wine, we decided to go to Toccanelli's Pizzeria in Maple Shade, which happens to be yup, a BYOB. We actually didn't get to open the bottle, though, because we were too busy keeping Nathan from joining in on the 21st birthday party that was sitting next to us, and distracting Ollie from running up to another table and demanding a slice of pizza because he was hungry. Have I mentioned that we hardly ever bring the boys out to eat because it usually ends up in half eaten meals and heartburn? It's virtually impossible to actually relax and eat when your children are climbing under the table, eating food off the floor, or starting a food fight with each other. This dinner was starting to look like it was going to be another bust, but lo and behold, when the pizza and salad came out, Ollie was happily eating and Nathan was busy playing with some St. Patrick's Day decorations above the booth. Whatever works, right?We made it through the whole dinner without too many issues and got to enjoy a family dinner out. Score! I should add that the pizza is absolutely delicious... we got a large pie, half plain, and half prosciutto and spinach for $14.95 and a large salad for $9.50, which could feed 3-4 (Ben and I ate the whole thing, since we're salad junkies.) $25 for dinner out for a family of 4 is a great deal, plus we could have enjoyed some wine and not been charged an arm and a leg for a bottle. What cash-strapped parent doesnt love a good deal? I highly recommend this restaurant for yummy pizza and family time... no clean-up involved! Saweet!

Oh, and Nathan never did eat his pizza even though he requested it earlier... go figure.

If it Look Likes a Duck.

As I was getting all sentimental just now about my friends, my boys were getting into their usual mischievious activities.

Nathan: "Mom, look what Oliver did!! He got pee-pee on the chair!" He points to his little Ikea lounger in Oliver's bedroom.

Me: "Well, Oliver has a diaper on, how did he pee on the chair? Did you pee on the chair?!"

Nathan, looking at me very seriously, "No, Mom, You know I go pee in the potty. Oliver did this."

Meanwhile, Oliver has a diaper on and Nathan is running around with no undies or pants on... hmmm... I am still trying to figure out this phenomenon.

I shouldn't be shocked that 3 year olds can fib, but try explaining logic to mine. I guess this is one argument I am not winning.

Sex in the City, Philly Edition

My besties and I have had a long standing tradition for over 10 years now. No matter how busy we are with work and now husbands and kids, we always get together for each other's birthdays (minus Jaime since she is a birthday scrooge haha) Lauren, Jaime, and I go all the back to '89, we used to go "Teen Night" at the Y (my dad always thought I was at a cheer leading tourney hehe) play basketball, softball, and cheer leading together, and be boy crazy (I have plenty of old notes to prove it). Jenn and I have been friends since freshmen year of high school (1996) and together we were partners in crime... sometimes literally, but I won't divulge too much. ;)

Yesterday was Laur's 27th birthday and we went to Cochon BYOB, off South Street in Philadelphia. The restaurant was very cute and cozy with a relaxed atmosphere and friendly service. The only downside was the lack of parking due to the mounds of melting snow taking up excess space. We came prepared with a bottle of champagne and my favorite wine of the moment, Montpellier.

I just love getting together with these girls and always have. Girls night or in this case, Brunch, is absolutely essential for any successful relationship in life, be it significant other, children, or work. Women need a safe place to talk about everyday occurrences no matter how insignificant they may seem, and believe me, we talk about everything under the sun. Yesterday's topics of interest included: Teething, baths (for baby and mom), diaper and non-diaper bags, coffee, Lent, Church, weddings, how we like our eggs cooked, plastic surgery, Facebook (of course), and plenty of others that I can't recall due to the champagne buzz I was catching at 2 in the afternoon.

My girlfriends are the only ones (besides Ben, of course) that I feel I can truly be myself around. I have done some very random and idiotic things in our days as being friends, and haven't felt embarrassed or judged. It's hard to explain how wonderful it is to be able to just sit and laugh about nothing at all, or to reminisce about when we were kids and growing up. Our stories have evolved from notes about cute boys and annoying teachers to cute kids and annoying spouses. I am so happy to have them in my life, and being an only child, feel blessed that my boys have aunts in their lives. They really are the sisters I never had, and being that they are probably the only ones that are reading this, haha.... I guess I should just say, thanks for being my friends, and I love you.

Scene from an Italian Restaurant

I just got home from a busy Friday night of bar tending. Fortunately for me, I happen to actually love serving drinks, so the shifts always go by quickly. I serve dozens of people on any given night, and tonight was no different, but one couple stands out in my mind. The man had told me earlier in the night that it was a "very special night" for them, but it was very busy and I didn't get a chance to ask them what they were celebrating. When it finally calmed down after their dinner, she giddily showed me her ring finger and said, "This is what we are celebrating!" It was a beautiful diamond ring! She told me he had put it on the strawberry on their dessert when she was in the restroom. I said, "Wow, congratulations! Did you just get engaged?" The man just chuckled and said, "Well, we did... a long time ago." It turns out they were celebrating 31 years together and he had proposed to her the same way, with the ring on a strawberry! It was so sweet and they seemed so happy and in love, like two teenagers in a summer romance. Think Sandy and Danny Zuko or Noah Calhoun and Allie Hamilton. Or that celebrity power couple, Ben and Vicki Goldwasser.

Ahhh, so much love in the air at Carrabbas. ;) I'm glad that I had all relatively happy people tonight, because nothing puts a damper on my "break" from the kiddos like a grumpy drunk!

Oh Holey Day.

It's 10am and I am having all kinds of dilemmas. First, my one Ugg boot went missing. Then, it was my cell phone. Both boys denied any kind of wrong doing, how unlike them.

I will allow myself only a couple random postings a day, so today the first random thought from me is... why is it that every pair of socks I own have holes in them?! It's bad enough that most of the time they don't even match (always cute when I go to play places that don't allow shoes) but now, at least one sock of every mismatched pair has a hole in it. It's not even in the heel, where I could at least hide it from other matchy matchy sock moms, they're in the toes! It just irks me because I bought a 6 pack of black socks for work from Target, only a couple weeks ago, and those are the culprits. Hmm... do they sell steel-toe socks?

I guess I will be (reluctantly) taking the boys back to Target today to buy a different brand of sock. Nothing like pushing around a 100 lb cart filled with 60 lbs of kids to get your juices flowing in the morning...

Happy Valentine's Day (again)

This morning as I was laying in bed, sleepily aware that Ben just walked out the door to work, I hear footsteps running upstairs. That can't be a good sign. (we don't have an upstairs, other than a finished attic which we hardly ever use) We do have an old computer upstairs that Nathan has been playing games on recently, so I figured that's what he was doing. I went to get Ollie from his crib and was very excited when he looked at me and said clear as day, "It's a bat," as he was pointing to a little baseball bat on the wall. At almost 17 months, I didn't think he was talking as much as Nathan was at his age, but he is picking up words left and right, including his favorite saying "ut-oh" that actually sounds more like "a-hole".

Anyway, Nathan walked in and had something behind his back. He gives it to Oliver and smiles lovingly, "Surprise! Happy Valentine's Day, Oliver! I love you." and gives him a hug and a kiss. Last week when we were printing out Valentine's Day cards for his classmates, I told him he should give one to Oliver, and he remembered.

Oh, be still my heart.

My Love Affair with Soup

It's 10:00 at night, and while most people are getting ready to hit the hay, I suddenly have a hankering for something to eat. I blame it on my late night dinners after working a shift at oh, so, waist-line friendly Carrabbas. Either that, or because I literally sometimes go the whole entire day consisting of two cups of coffee and whatever bits and pieces of food that don't make it into my sons' mouths.

Whatever the cause, I am hungry, and after a call to Ben's office, have a confirmation that he will be coming home soon. Since I didn't get a chance to crock pot it today, what can I whip up that doesn't come in a box or can? I remembered a recipe from my trusty Wegman's Menu magazine... asparagus soup, which supposedly can go from counter to table in 15 minutes. What do I have to lose?

I should add that I make soup for dinner at least twice a week, Ben and I just love eating soup for some odd reason. Even my picky Nathan has taken a liking soup, telling me today, "Mom, I like meatballs in my soup." I get no complaints from Oliver, of course.

I should also add that the picture above is not my soup... I'll have to see if I can discover where the kids put my camera card, so I can take a picture of my concoction. I am also trying to figure out how to insert links, so I can link the recipe. Why am I so technologically challenged? My friend, Jaime, can even vouch for me that I have never even burned a CD. That's pretty sad!

Edited to add: Wegman's Asparagus Soup Recipe

Scent of the moment.

Before I forget, I just have to give a shout-out to my hard-working hubby, Ben. He has been putting in massive amounts of hours at the office for tax season, and hopefully he can sneak online to start reading my brand spankin new blog that I created yesterday. We love and miss you bebe!! Only 8 more weeks left and I can have my husband back!

Moving on... it has been 4 days since Valentine's Day and although Ben and I hardly ever celebrate the day, it's another reason for me to get a new perfume! I looooove this scent and it is making me long for Spring!! It is so fresh and flowery, just like a warm spring day. It also is a limited edition kind of thing, so I would get it soon before it runs out. Now I can't wait for the Clinique Bonus! I just love those little makeup bags!

When I am feeling a little overwhelmed during the day, I spray a little of this on, and it makes me happy. :) Clinique knows what they are doing over there.

Today is a new day.

Don't you hate it when you get woken up in the middle of a very vivid dream, only to forget it moments later? I awoke to one boy crying and the other yelling for a sundae, and damn it, I went to blog about it a few minutes later and had already forgotten. I vaguely remember something about warm sand and blue oceans... oh wait, those were distant memories of my pre-hellion days. I remember a time when I used to jump out of bed with a vengeance ready to conquer the day and now... well, my 3 year old stands next to me, hands me my glasses, and sings, "Mooooom, open your eyes , put your eyeballs in (my contacts)". It's OK, today is a new day. Yesterday was filled with no naps, a very cranky baby, and a glass of wine to deal with the whine at 4:30pm.

Also, Nathan goes back to school today, so if all goes well, I may get an afternoon break! Two weeks ago I kept him home because he was sick, and last week he had two snow days. I can't wait till snow days equal fun days again! Two kids cooped up in the house while we get 70" total of snow... yea, well, someone had their straight jacket on that week.

Gotta love those little stinkers, as I write this Oliver is wrapping up his big brother in the curtains and both are laughing hysterically. Brotherly love.

Naptime is the new happy hour, but not today.

I stumbled across this site as I was attempting to take a 5 minute break from my usual hectic day. I think I may have Googled "Moms, wine consumption, and/or padded walls for sale". My oldest was supposed to be having "quiet time" in his room, but today it seemed he would rather be around me (what else is new) and drag a toy car irritatingly back and forth on the table in front of me... anything to get my attention. My youngest was in his bedroom, overtired, cranky, and the perfect background noise for my pounding headache.

It's not like I don't love my job, believe me, my boys are my world. It's just that a happy mama is the best kind of mama, and today I am not feeling my best. I am staring at a pile of laundry that my oldest, Nathan is currently sitting on. My baby, Ollie, is frustrated that he can't climb on the couch, is whining and dripping an orange Popsicle everywhere. Oh, did I mention that Ollie never went down for a nap? Hence, the pop to keep him content. Sigh. Thank God for Peppa Pig right now.

There is a glimmer of hope! Some girlfriends and I are going to a local bowling alley for ladies night! $5 martinis and moms throwing heavy balls should make for a great stress reliever. Where would moms be without ladies night out?! The thought scares me... I just hope I have the energy to make it out the door in one piece, or at least without some orange sticky mess on the back of my shirt. I better go, the boys are getting destructive right now...